Did you know that depending on your parenting style, you are likely increasing or decreasing your child’s odds for drinking, smoking and using other drugs? In fact, your parenting style affects everything from your child’s social skills and self-esteem to their school performance and overall decision-making. A family’s parenting style serves as a huge influence for who the child is in the present and the adult he or she will become. Read on to determine your parenting style.
There are four basic parenting styles: Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive and Uninvolved.
Are you an Authoritarian parent?
- This parent is very strict and very controlling.
- Rules are clearly stated and, if broken, punishments are harsh so that the
- child “suffers” for his or her poor choices.
- There is no room for negotiation and little regard for the child’s opinion.
- This parent is low on warmth and communication while high on expectations.
- It’s the mindset of “my way or the highway – period.”
Are you an Authoritative
- This parent maintains control and authority while being understanding and supportive.
- The reasons behind the rules are explained and expectations are clearly known.
- If rules are broken, logical consequences (meant to help them make better
- choices) follow.
- This parent is high on warmth, communication and expectations.
- It’s the mindset of “setting boundaries, providing support and keeping communication open.”
Are you a Permissive
- This parent is non-controlling and indulgent.
- Rules may exist, but are rarely enforced or may be easily compromised to avoid conflict.
- Parent vs. child roles are “blurred.”
- This parent is high on warmth and communication, and low on expectations.
- It’s the mindset of “Pals before parents.”
Are you an Uninvolved
- This parent is indifferent toward their child, known to reject and neglect.
- There are no set rules or consequences.
- These children are on their own, raising themselves without the emotional support or guidance of a loving parent.
- Warmth, communication and expectations are virtually non-existent.
- It’s the “whatever” parenting mindset – so long as it doesn’t inconvenience mom or dad.
While you may find that your parenting is a blend of more than one style, choose the one that best describes you and your co-parent’s overall style. In a future tip, we’ll take a close look at each one so that you may determine how your parenting style measures up for your child’s success.
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Sources: Gwen DeWar PH.D. - ParentingScience.com: The Authoritative Parenting Style. John Lee - ChooseHelp.com: Parenting Styles that Prevent Drug and Alcohol Experimentation. Bianca Mgbemere and Rachel Telles - Vanderbelt.edu: Types of Parenting Styles and How to Identify Yours, Dec. 2013. Amy Morin, LCSW VeryWell.com: 4 Types of Parenting Styles and Their Effects on Kids, May 2017. The Right Step: Four Families, Four Parenting Styles: Which Lead to Adolescent Drug Abuse? Aug. 2014. Dr. Maryann Rosenthal – TheAttachedFamily.com: Four Parenting Styles – What Works and What Doesn’t, Aug. 2009. Shreyas Tirumala: Yale News - Parenting style linked to alcohol use. Oct. 2014.